Your Post-Coital Conversation Guide


Back in my rookie days of sleeping around, I often struggled with how to handle the post-game festivities. Was it time to cuddle? Talk? Sleep? Leave? It all depended on the woman, and what sort of mood I created. If I got her to the ledge of orgasm, then sprayed her back like I was […]

Do Men Prefer the Hunt?


“Shhh. Be vewy, vewy, quiet. It’s woman season. I’m woman huntin’.” My answer to this often asked question is, “It depends.” There are many factors that come into play, including how old (and tired of chasing) the man is, and how long it’s been since his last meal. It also depends on the hunted. How […]

… but, I Still Want to See Her Naked


It amazes me that no matter how poorly some women behave, an exposed nipple causes male amnesia. I realize we are visual beasts, but isn’t there any way for us to override this? Logic dissolves as skin is exposed. A woman has no problem with this. The sexy man treats her poorly, and she loses […]

Kiss My Dad Butt


Girls are into the dad bod? Right. That’s like guys saying they’re into naturally saggy boobs, saddlebags, and cellulite. Being into something is different than tolerating it. If you’re into it, you’re implying you prefer it. No woman prefers a beer belly and man tits. I can understand if the angle is that the woman […]

Clumsy with His Prey


A hungry lion (me) is sitting at a bar in a fine sushi restaurant. It’s Saturday night—the dreaded couples night. Across from me is a couple around thirty. She’s stunning; he’s pissing me off. Why? Because he’s neglecting her. You see, while his lovely brunette is on his right, there’s an unattended blonde on his […]

Free on Kindle This Week: How to Date Men by Phil Torcivia

Get it here: Odds are, somewhere between 99% and 100% of your romantic relationships have ended. You are the common denominator, so logic would say you suck at relationships. I wouldn’t say that. You see, at this point, 100% of my relationships ended. Some served their purpose and ended nicely, while others definitely failed. […]

Caretaker or Troublemaker?


When my buddies go radio silent, guess who gets the call? Me. This puts me in a difficult position. There are numerous reasons why my friends don’t want to speak to their women, few of which actually involve me. So, why call me? Many would say it’s because I’m the responsible type. Others would say […]

Free Signed Paperback Copies of How to Date Men by Phil Torcivia


As a thank you to my readers, reviewers, and supporters, I’m sending signed copies of my latest book to the first 100 fans who request it. I hope you read it, giggle a bit, review it, and pass it on to someone who needs “man” advice. Name and address (US only) is all I need, […]

Things That Make Men Creepy


Let me begin by admitting I’ve done my share of creepy things. Not denying it. Rarely, however, is my intention to hurt the target. Usually, my creepiness involves what I intend to be a compliment, not taken as such. Like humor, I can’t control how my comments are taken and, if I soften my comments, […]

Locked in Phone Hell


I’ve never been so attached to something I loathe. Phones are hell, especially for introverts. Maybe, I don’t want to be connected. Access to information is nice, but connected? No, thank you. When my phone rings or dings, I want to throw it. Still, every day I’m stuck in the left lane behind some swerving […]

Sexuality—All Flavors Are Delicious


We are gradually moving away from defining people by their sexual preferences. That’s wonderful, right? We really have no reason to care about another person’s preference. Yet, when I take personal inventory in the sense of, “How do I feel about …?,” I do find some interesting results. For example, if the woman I’m dating […]

A Kinder, Gentler Cupcake


Have you noticed the trend of young people demanding instead of requesting? Maybe it comes with the sense of entitlement 90s children have. Perhaps they were spoiled by Mommy and Daddy’s portfolio fattening during the decades of excess. Whatever the reason, these brats need to learn we old-timers don’t react well to demands. Take this […]

The Selfie Dick


I glance over to the community table, and, much to my horror, watch some self-absorbed nitwit unfold this odd device, place his phone on the end, and take a team selfie. The stick reminds me of the folding ruler we had in grade school. Much like the Nuns back in the day, I’d also like […]

Loving Unhealthy Stuff


Let me ask your advice. If there’s a woman I adore, and I know (well, I’m pretty sure) if I ever hook up with her, we’re going to miserable (or, blissful), should I continue to pursue the relationship? I know—of course not. My problem is I don’t like wanting. It’s a sign of weakness. I’d […]

His Ding-a-Ling


People nowadays spend too much time seeing the world through a phone lens. This creates a new level of over-sharing. Pictures get posted all over social media as iPhone reporters can’t wait to show off their latest work. If you’re around a group of people, I guarantee one of them is in the middle of […]